Somehow, an entire month has passed since my last blog post. Believe me, I’ve thought about it. I’ve had about a million different ideas of things to write about. But I’ve also spent 347 hours in the garden, put up at least 112 ears of corn, 28 cans of green beans, and I’ve lost track of the rest.
And then we took off to Port A for a week. And I did nothing. Nothing except lounge, read, fish, eat (I’m always down for good food) soak up some sunshine & visit with friends. It was amazing. And ever-so-needed.
But now we’re back. And this morning it’s raining. There’s not a whole lot to do when it’s raining like this, and my house is already clean. I’ve also already consumed WAY too much coffee, done the FB & IG mindless scroll of death. Cleaned up dog puke (this is not my niche). I’ve snuggled with the kids in their beds, set up shop in the office to attempt to get life & business organized (because that mindless scroll will get you every time), started listening to some business training (because osmosis).
Then it hits me, again. I should write something. But I always come back to the same question – What do I share about? What do I share without oversharing? Internet sharing is the equal of waving one’s dirty laundry for 10 million people to see. What if someone interprets it wrong & blows it out of the water? What if I worded it wrong? What if I get death threats? What if no one reads it? What do I bring to the table? Does this help or hurt? Will I be judged if I cuss, if I show the real me – even if it IS relatable? Does it come across as all about me? Nobody likes that guy.
But then I wonder – why do I care? This IS my blog, after all. People will come and go. Their opinions of me really don’t actually matter if my intentions are good (plus they’re none of my business), but then I am opening up myself to a can of worms by doing the whole internet thing. And then I remember, you can’t say the wrong thing to the right person, and you can’t say the right thing to the wrong person. It’s true.
So where do I go with this blog? I dunno. Experts say to focus on your “niche”. My “niche” is a shade of everything that doesn’t actually go together…Family, Jesus, Gardening, Friends, Camping, Wine….where are my “everything” peeps at, anyways? I KNOW you’re out there!
The whole thing makes me feel squeamish, uncomfortable,
slightly really anxious, and even occasionally tear up. But I know that these things wouldn’t play on repeat, over and over in my heart without a cause. I know that connections wouldn’t have been made with people without these things in our life having happened. It’s more than coincidence & our stories & voices are SO MUCH BIGGER than we can imagine. That we can use them to help people.
While visiting with a mentor a while back, I was really concerned & focused on what I could do to help others – through servanthood (volunteering), donating…etc. Our conversation ended with “bloom where you are planted”. Y’all, I’ve heard that saying a million times, but this time it clicked. I need to use where I am NOW to GROW and help others. Sounds so simple, right? I mean, why didn’t *I* think of that? lol
–>>Oh yeah, and doing “all the things” doesn’t actually get more jewels on our heavenly crowns, ladies.<<–
So where are you planted, in this season of life? Are you using it for good, or trying as hard as hell to run away from it? I’m super guilty of the latter. And then I realize that it’s because I’ve allowed the devil to get his foot in the door just enough (insert tiny, whispering voice here) to make me doubt how awesome our God is & what miracles He is capable of. #nottodaysatan
So I am blooming, y’all. It’s probably going to be ugly. It’s kind of like the image below- full of things that will poke, hurt, and “getcha” if you’re not careful. And if you stop reading, I’m sure it’s because you’ve totally gotten everything together in life, and I congratulate you. (we should totally do coffee so you can tell me how you do it) But if you’re willing, stay with me. Be a part of this journey. I believe in my heart that we all need a little bit more Jesus, a little less drama, and a whole lot of forgiveness & grace.